You Are More
The right words found me at the exact right time this week, beloved. “You are more than your social media spaces." - Kaitlin Curtice
You are more than your social media spaces. - Kaitlin Curtice
I know that culture might seem to be saying that what you don’t post (or share) doesn’t matter. But truly, I cannot stop believing that the richest part of our lives is lived offscreen. There is no virtual embrace that replaces the real one from my daughter at 6 am. There is no online forum that takes care of my soul the same way that a cup of tea with a close friend - in close proximity - does. And while I love all social spaces, I won’t ignore the food that is real, raw, rich hand-in-hand humanity.
Strange Seasons & Other Things
I’m thankful that my life isn’t entirely lived online.
In certain seasons it has been.
I can clearly remember when being with people wasn’t possible. For example when the post-Dengue mind fog wrapped around every once-brilliant-ish brain cell, stripping my soul of its most valued practices and prayers. Also, I recall when my womb contracted around the clock, a precious babe preparing to exit early despite my greatest plans.
These are just two seasons in a bucketful in which I could only thrive in online spaces. To say I was grateful for some sort of connection with the world would be an absolute understatement! It was deeply necessary that I be “with” people.
Here’s a thought, though… what if in the seasons that aren’t strange and different and difficult or hard we cultivated relationships that embraced us in all the others?
I can’t think of any season where I didn’t have a single visitor pop by! Even if it didn’t seem like enough at the time, it was a blessed God-wink.
You Are More
Anyhow, I just wanted to remind you that you are more.
Like Kaitlin reminded me, I’m passing on the gift.
And, if you need a moment to reflect on your relationships and your life, I hear you! Most of you grasp that our complicated and complex lives sometimes try to take us down. We’re not out though. We’re just sitting on the sidelines waiting to be tagged back in by a reminder just like this.
I’ll end here with two things:
Tag, you’re it. Remind someone of their value & worth in the coming days. I want you to take a moment and really open up your hands to this, beloved. Breathe this in. Breathe reality in. While your reality might be hard, we cannot speak life into cultural norms that squeeze individual identities into boxes and say we’re winning. Also, I find that by lifting others up… I’m better. Not always physically, of course. But the pain of being human, it gets a little lighter.
The same way you honor reality, honor disappointment. Don’t dwell on what challenges you couldn’t overcome, though. Instead, give it space in your life. What does this look like? I recently started looking at the book proposal process - support in finding an agent. I read through one “book doctors” list of clients over the years and immediately noted that a large number of the clients have not been published yet. But get this… they still left her rave reviews! This is how you honor disappointment. We don’t know what’s coming next. And, I’d like to think we know that the Universe will be there to hold us though, no matter what. (I wrote an article for People Hope on this that you can find here.)
One Last Thing
I know the comparison trap exists. I know that sometimes, we can’t see how very valuable we are. Once upon a time, I was there too.
Some food for thought here, though…
While hardship does tend to bother us from time to time earthside, must we be the ones to bring it upon ourselves?
I’d like to think once we know better, we do better. And I’d like to hope that I am living proof… daily undoing the damage of overextending myself and building a better legacy of a mother, woman, human who serves from fullness.
What about you? How are you coping with hardness?
I love you, beautiful human.
I love humanity.
I believe we’ve got a great road ahead of us.
You, me, them… all of us.
Squeezes,
J. 🌻 @thebarefootpreacher
P.S. A side note from this message: Kaitlin’s words were meant for her BIPOC writer/creative audience, so I don’t want to sugarcoat this and say that our experience is the same. It’s not. Truly and deeply. Also, I think that if we are to cross any barriers and make Heaven on earth a reality - we must both work to alleviate the struggle of those who are othered and also find our sameness, day after day after day.
If you haven’t read Kaitlin’s work on identity and belonging, you can find her book Native here. Collectively, we bear many identities; and, I’m presently being fed by her words.
Feel free to share this You Are More message with a friend. And through both of us, may these words meet the masses.
New here? Reclamation is a newsletter and conversation-starter. We are a safe space for caregivers of all kinds - from parents to pastors - to question complicated lives and also, claim & claim again supernatural peace here on earth.